Dear Friend

Dear Friend,

I didn't really know you, though I knew of you. I was with a group of ladies and as I mentioned my thoughts on possibly homeschooling, your family came up. I was impressed with the ladies, as they had an understanding of what you did and explained it to me without any judgement or negativity. I, however, was receiving it with full negativity. I COULD NEVER DO THAT! I did not see how you could claim to homeschool your children and not even worry about teaching them to READ! I judged, ignorantly and harshly. And for that, I apologize.
Little did I know, that you would soon become a mentor, a guide and an inspiration to me. Little did I know that the beauty of what you do would plant in my heart and grow. Little did I know how much trusting your confidence in a "radical" idea would change my life and the lives of my family members.
I first spent time with you when you invited me to your house. Together we sat and conversed. You were real, not the extreme lady I had judged you to be. You were fun and you were so open to sharing. I saw your children, the way they loved and helped one another. The way they had ambition and drive. The way they acted on their thoughts and plans. And mostly, their intense drive to share- just like you, they were joyful and eager to share their passions and adventures with me. And you shared so beautifully. I found myself hearing new ideas that I could instantly recognize as truth. I found myself agreeing and wanting to learn more. You gladly shared and I eagerly absorbed wonderful ideas.
But then, I wasn't ready to let go of what I had. I was comfortable in conformity. I figured I'd borrow aspects of the things you shared and do them my way. I struggled in attempting to make my knowledge of how to teach fit in with what I now believed was the right way to help my kids learn. I went through one idea after another and couldn't settle on anything. I spent all of my time making plans and none of my time learning OR teaching. And then, I gave up. I did nothing. But, the seed you had planted kept growing and at last, I decided it was time to nurture that seed.
I now feel ready to start this journey, of becoming a leader and example. Of learning and growing so that I can help my children want to learn and grow. I have become many of the things I had judged you for being. And for that, I am grateful.
So dear friend, I apologize again for my harsh judgements. And, I thank you. Thank you for being open and willing to share with me. Thank you for the many times you have reached out and continued to teach me and help me to grow. Thank you for your patience in answering my questions. Thank you for your example and guidance. Thank you for helping our family get to where we are. Thank you for becoming a dear friend to me.

Sincerely,
Lydia

Short Months Rush By Quickly

The baby turned 6 months and I totally missed our typical photo shoot. (but got these instead)

And then we did another shoot on Valentine's Day.

 Then we went to a party at a friend's house.

The BEST Birthday Present I Didn't Know I Wanted

I think it was just after Christmas that my husband first started talking about my birthday present. He was excited enough for me to "hear" it in the messages he typed to me. I, knowing my husband, figured I would know what it was in a week or two. Honestly, as he talked about it, I was more excited to see how long he could keep it a secret than I was over receiving it. But, he didn't slip. He would tell me, excitedly, time and time again that he worked on my birthday present again. I waited for him to decide that he wanted me to know what it was more than he wanted me to be surprised. I kept waiting. He kept NOT telling me. As my doubt that he would reveal his secret rose, so did my curiosity. I began to "watch" his language for clues as to what it could be. His excitement grew and became highly contagious. I began to want him to slip and tell me, at the same time, I thought it'd be awfully nice to be surprised. (I'm glad he kept it secret).
Then one day, he typed that it was done. He would be sending a package soon and I would have my present, most likely, before my birthday. I was nervous by this point, what if I didn't love it as much as he thought I would. What if he put all that work into it and I only mildly appreciated it? We stopped talking about it and I didn't really think of it. Until I saw the box on the doorstep. I knew it was THE box, the one with my present. I wanted to rip into it and finally know what it was. But, I didn't remember if I was supposed to. Did he say I could open it when it came, or was I supposed to wait until the end of the month for my birthday? Could I even wait that long? It was still hours before he would be on for me to ask. And so, I waited again.

I opened the package surrounded by my kids. My gift was right on top. It was a CD with a note "HAPPY BDAY Babe, I hope you enjoy and remember I will always Love you." The CD itself was marked as being Lydia's Bday mix. So, he made me a mix of songs. I was interested in listening to them, but not anxious. I still had to get the kids to bed and I was typing to my husband then. I told him thanks and that I would be able to listen to it when I was done. We went through other things in the box and I was almost more excited for some of the random stuff he sent (like UNO- now that the girls are old enough to play it, and a few great books). I played cards with the girls, fed the baby, typed with my husband and didn't think much about the CD. Finally, over two hours after I had opened the package, I put the CD in my computer and hit play.

I spent the next two hours listening, and crying and typing to and praising my husband and talking with others on facebook about how awesome he is. My husband sent me HIM for my birthday. The CD started with Folsom Prison Blues, rewritten and resung by my husband to tell the story of his deployment. Next, the song I've been waiting for, A Girl Worth Fighting For. He covered a total of 18 songs (plus a bonus song). Each one made me cry again the moment he started singing it. Each song took me to a different memory of our relationship. Each song brought my husband to me. Each song filled me with happiness and love.
I've listened to this CD at least four times through (and more partial listenings) in the past 27 hours. I"ve played it for the kids. Lexi listened at first and hesitantly said, "that sounds like Daddy almost." I told her it was Daddy singing to us and she said, "that makes me want to cry almost." Now she excitedly exclaims, "I recognize this." after almost every new song starts. Emily dances to the CD and asks to play her favorites over and over. Nater doesn't really care (two year old boys must not really get how awesome it is to have Daddy sing to you). And William listens and looks around for his dad, he even stops nursing just to listen to his Dad sing.
I couldn't feel more loved. I never could have asked for a gift like this, because I honestly never could have imagined how wonderful it would be to have a piece of Philip in our home again. It is definitely nice to have something to help us feel close to him as we wait to have all of him back with us again. Thank you so much love! This truly is the best present!

Making and Keeping Memories

I love my kids!
I love being home with them and getting to raise them.
I love home school.
I love seeing glimpses of how their minds work.
I love seeing glimpses of how their hearts feel.
I loved the way this played out today.
My girls finally put to good use the costumes I made them for Christmas. Emily paired her sweater and tail with wings and told me she was a dragon. I told her she looked quite ferocious. We then had to look up the meaning of ferocious.
And then, furious. Alexis explained that she had read the word furious in a story and then began to recite the story to me.
I asked, "is it easy for you to memorize books?"
YES!
And then I got to listen as the girls discussed memorization. I got to see both how Emily's mind works and her heart feels.

 "...every night in February my memories escape. But I can still rememory my family's names because every night before my amemories escape they travel down all the way down to my heart and can't escape. Yep!"

Here are a few of the amemories from January that I want our hearts to hold on to.

I like taking pictures on Sunday because we are all dressed nicely.

Being goofy with Aunt Mir

Not wanting to do our photo shoot because it was cold out

Painting

I think this may be his first time. He loved it!

A friend came to paint with us.

His sister came too, she is such a cutie!

He doesn't like being dirty and had paint on his feet.

Making chicken nuggets

Wetting his pants during his photo shoot.

 

Retail Therapy Or Expanding My Talents?

I went to Goodwill the other day, to look for kid's hangers actually (because my kids have more clothes than I have hangers). I had the baby with me and realized his diaper had leaked. Since we were planning on being out all day, I thought I'd pick him up another outfit. From that moment, I was trapped! I don't know who it is that donates to our local goodwill, but they have good taste! I spotted a wonderful orange and white dress shirt in Nater's size. I had to have it. One thing led to another, and I walked out of the store with a plan and a huge bag of clothing (I remembered the hangers last minute too).

So, here you have my latest "family" photo shoot. All of the pictures are taken by me, except for the ones that have me in them- Mir did those. We had 7 of the 18 clothing items already- I purchased the rest that day. All of the pictures are SOOC (straight out of camera). I feel like I am comfortable with the way my camera functions now and I want to start catching great natural light (so that was the goal- get outside in the outfits at the right time/light). By the way, the orange and teal is my current favorite color combination!

So what do you think? Worth the impulsive shopping spree?